Wet Silver Falling Over Peach Skin
by Ciel D'or Serendipite
Summary: It hurts that it feels like Keigo shares more of himself with millions of strangers who love him, than with Ryoma, who loves him the most, and the utmost painfully. AtoRyo, Oneshot. Rated T but implied M.


Disclaimer: I dun own the characterrrssss~ bananana~ But I do kind of own this plotline~! bananana~

Pairing: RoyalRoyalRoyal

Word Count: 1,135

Warning: Implied um, R stuff so yeahhh...

A/N: This is kind of a boy group AU as in like the kpop ones specifically, because it sort of talks about them...but I think you'll be fine if you don't know a lot about kpop groups haha. At least I hope so...should be...

For: ATOBELOVER BANANANA~

Aghhhh, I know it's been a really long time *sobs* I totally forgot how to make this beginning part, haha, I bet I forgot stuff...Well, you guys can thank Atochan and a heavy amount of JongTae fanfic for this oneshot. Go, read my darlings! *smooches*

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Ryoma watches Keigo sleep soundly in his bed, sticky and disheveled with residue of their nightly escapades. They're in the same bedroom this time- or to be more accurate, some arranging and bribing was done, but it doesn't matter.

They would have ended up in the same bed anyway.

Ryoma tenderly steps out onto the carpet of the messy dorm room, taking small strides, careful not to do anything that would screw up his backside more than it already had been.

He picks up a shirt that been tossed down haphazardly; he doesn't care who's it is but he is fairly sure it's Keigo's if the abundant amounts of lavender are anything to go by.

The boy wanders over to the window-seat and watches the crowds of nightlife move throughout the roads. It is always busiest at this time, he knows, although it is far past midnight; he wonders if perhaps this is happening much too often for him to get so accustomed to the nightly events.

He closes his eyes tiredly and sighs. These are the hours in which he feels worst, after Keigo has already drowned him in love, after the pretenses of the day have been washed away.

Keigo is the one who stepped into his life and stole his heart. The first time he heard his powerful voice, when he was still fifteen and the baby of their group. The same exact voice, though grown and even more amazing now, rings in his head throughout these hours.

He feels like crying whenever the hazel-lavender haired man blows them away with a new song. They're group is like a family, coddling each other, laughing and being playful. Everyone always being friendly and overly friendly, working off each other's particular quirks. Syuusuke's teasing coupled with his kind nature, Seiichi's motherly habits, Gen's awkward stern-ness, Kunimitsu's hidden playfulness under his stoic exterior. Ryoma feels safe with them, like he belongs, but at the same time he feels so far away.

He, is the baby, the tough one, the one with the sassy mouth and the devilish disposition, the one who, even still, can't help but show his childishness and pure, untainted self, despite everything. But sometimes he wishes he could just go back to his real family, his mother, father, and his brother. Sometimes he wishes he could just sit down and become a real kid again.

Then, as soon as the thought comes, his chest tightens, his heart hurts at the thought of separating from Keigo, and the foolish consideration is quickly thrown away.

He would never be able to leave the man.

He pulls his long legs to himself tighter, sitting bunched up in a small lump on the seat cushion. He feels loneliest when he hears some of the more heartfelt songs Keigo writes. When Keigo is friendly with him, acting like a brother, and overplaying his diva role for the cameras it makes him feel warm like they truly are a family. But then Keigo goes and sings and he realizes that they aren't. He doesn't know the others deepest secrets, doesn't know how they really feel, doesn't really know anything they don't want him to know, and the same is true for him. They don't know about the accursed insecurities that seem to haunt his every outer act. And yes, the him he shows to the cameras and the fans is truly Ryoma, but it's just a part of him, not the whole thing- just what they want to see.

He never shows the haunting doubts and ugly feelings that weigh him down only to escape during these dwindling after hours.

And even though he can accept that the others aren't the family they try to be, that they can only ever be friends, it's different with Keigo. The reason it hurts a million times more when he learns something he hadn't known about Keigo through his melodic words, is because Keigo is his _lover. _Keigo can make him bear himself raw and ugly, can make him breakdown and spill his soul and it hurts that he feels he can't do the same.

It hurts that it feels like Keigo shares more of himself with millions of strangers who love him, than with Ryoma, who loves him the most, and the utmost painfully.

This is the reason that when hot liquid begins forming and burning at the corners of his eyes, it feels like hell. Ryoma never cries not since his debut, at least not like this.

He had been sure he'd cried all his tears getting where he was, he hadn't cried at their first concert or at all during all their 'firsts' in the beginning years.

But now raw and unadulterated sobs ripped through his throat, his mouth opening unwillingly and jerkily as he cried his first tears in years. He curls into himself, his body torn between trying to stop and fighting to let the whole world hear his cries.

Keigo is a deep sleeper, not naturally, but through all the work and stress and passionate nights he has become one, and even he wakes up after one particularly loud cry, rushing over to him immediately.

Ryoma can no longer see through the heavy pools of tears clouding his eyes, but he feels Keigo's strong arms holding him close, tightly, _preciously. _Ryoma's bony knees press almost painfully against the older man's chest- but he doesn't care. Keigo's beautiful fingers are carding themselves through Ryoma's soft locks, rubbing soothing circles along his heaving backside. Then Keigo lifts Ryoma cautiously, delicate and caring touches, careful not to injure him, and he carries him slowly to the bed rocking him at the same time.

Keigo hushes the muttered apologies that Ryoma attempts through his sobs and croaks. The elder mutters a gentle _I Love You_ and continues his soothing whispers of sweet nothings into his hair, pecking his forehead, then his left cheek and the right cheek, kissing away the tears.

Ryoma's chest swells at the rare words-he never, ever asks if Keigo loves him, never dares to- and more tears spill across his smooth cheeks with happiness and the overwhelming emotions. He whispers back a broken up _I love you too _and Keigo just presses Ryoma's smaller body tighter to himself in response, warming up his cold limbs.

Ryoma is breathing deeply, wondering idly how a few syllables from Keigo's perfect lips can make him feel so, so, _so_ delighted. A small, exhausted, but pure smile crawls upon his lips. Keigo whispers the promise of tomorrow into his ear and so Ryoma relaxes slightly in his secure hold, letting go of his doubts and pains and heavy feelings, at least for tonight.

Despite everything, he is sure that right now is the most loved he has ever felt.

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Ack, I got worse ugh. Bad writing skills, bad. (Take my humble gift, Atochaaannn~! Haha.) Anyway I kind of very loosely did Ryoma like Taemin of SHINee (at least fanfic version of him) not so much his personality, that's all Ryoma (even though he's out of character, I know, I got worse, but it's also the situation okay) but more in his role of the (OT6) group as the youngest and some other stuffs. It's not very important. I'm just really obsessed with SHINee fanfics right now so I did stuff.

Ahh, please review~? Since it's been awhile... TvT


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